Louise, Age 37
I have always felt that I have had a normal sex drive. I have had 5 sexual partners and while the relationship aspect of some of these encounters has not always been great, the sex was always fantastic. I met my husband when I was 32 and we had great chemistry and had sex several times a week.
Life got very busy, work was difficult, buying a house, getting a mortgage and planning a wedding became very stressful. All of this time I still wanted sex as much as ever but I found it very painful every time he inserted his penis inside me. I started to make excuses and while we continued to be sexually active I always made sure we did other things like perform oral sex on each other. After a number of months, he noticed that things had changed and became very upset and felt that I did not desire him anymore, this was about as far from the truth as possible and we started to argue over small things and we both became sexually frustrated.
I went to my GP, who did some tests and explained there was nothing physically wrong with me and suggested that I had Vaginismus. My GP referred me to Sharon a Psychotherapist with qualifications in psychosexual therapy. Initially I was very nervous, but Sharon made me feel very comfortable. She gave me a lot of information on the condition and assured me that while everyone’s story is different around one third of women will experience symptoms of vaginismus at some point in her life. She also explained that whilst it can be distressing for both partners in a relationship it is a treatable condition.
We explored several aspects of my life and relationship and Sharon gave me homework exercises with Vaginal Trainers, they felt a bit unusual at the beginning but after a short time they were much more comfortable. After 6 sessions my sexual confidence increased and I was able to have full sexual intercourse, it took a little while for my relationship to fully recover, but now we are in a very good place.
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